Inspiration

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I met a very inspiring lady yesterday. Actually, I didn’t just meet her…I’ve known her for a few years now on a once or twice a year acquaintance level. However, she is one of those folks who you still call “friend” because she is so darn nice, and intelligent, and….nice. Anyway, I haven’t seen her since January and when she walked in yesterday she looked like an entirely new person! She’s lost 45 pounds so far by sheer lifestyle change. No crazy diets, no surgery, nothing over the top. Just eating better foods and adding some form of exercise to her daily routine, even if it is just a short walk at lunch.

She looks fantastic, but mostly she looks happy. Which was awesome.

This journey is somewhat hard for me because I hide my weight well. It isn’t really even hidden, it is just how my body carries it. I’m a big girl and apparently don’t look “fat” to most people. When I shop for clothing (or when friends are cleaning out closets) people don’t believe that I wear a size 18 pant (and sometimes even that is too snug) or a 22-24 women’s size shirt. When they ask how much I want to lose they balk when I tell them around 50 pounds. No one believes that I have that much on me to lose.

It makes it hard to stay motivated – I don’t know if people are just being nice with their comments, or if they just have limited spacial-relation capabilities, or if they have been so desensitized by the crazy number of severely overweight people around here that they truly don’t see it anymore. Whatever the case, when everyone keeps telling me they think I look great, it makes it hard to keep going sometimes. It makes it easy to get lax and say, yeah, I look fine. Why put myself through all this?

The thing is, I don’t feel fine. I’m not comfortable in my own skin. I’m not healthy. (Though I admit, I am feeling better after four to five weeks of running!) And so I guess the point of all this was that it was so refreshing to talk to someone else who did it for herself. Who is feeling great and who didn’t tell me I looked fine, but instead told me, “You can do it!”

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4 responses »

  1. I love this post. And once again I can relate to what you’ve written. It’s great to be able to find unexpected inspiration during your journey.

  2. Great to find inspiration from many places!

    I never put stock in what people say. but I do know that whatever your appearance, you are feeling better after starting to exercise more!

    • So true, Holly! I think right now the toughest thing is that Neil is so ambivalent about what I am doing. Though, I have to give him credit for no longer trying to convince me that I am fine the way I am. It would just be nice to have more active support from those closest to me, as in actual distance…my family is very supportive, but even that is hard with them all so far away. And YOU have be so awesomely supportive as well – just so we’re clear on that (Amanda, that goes for you too!)

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